Friday, March 1, 2013

THE SUPPOSED HATE AND SADNESS POST TURNED OUT TO BE GOODIE GOOD

Pain comes back as soon as it goes. It is like a boomerang that finds its way back, to stab and strangle me all over again. It really hurts so bad and I cannot seem to get over it. I cannot seem to forget. That you left me and well, it really looks like you are not coming back.

I became so tired of comments that I am stupid and well, too slow. Why did I become so weak?

Recently, I have been asked a lot of questions about letting go or holding on towards relationships. I wish I could tell them all the negativity that I have realized. All things are not permanent. We all know that but somewhere along the path we deny ourselves the reality that could have saved us in the end. But for a momentary happiness we sacrifice our rationality just to feel alive maybe.

Enough with that. I was told a while ago that well, if you allow yourself to be defeated by external stress, you will die early. I just have to try to be stronger. I just have to gather strength from those who also struggle like me. Well, I will not give up on this. I will not give up on myself and my dreams. Love is just one aspect of life. It is not everything. Or should I say. A man is not the sole source of happiness. At least, that is what I realized now. There are those who tried to save me when I ran to their arms for comfort and refuge. I asked for help because I needed it. I acknowledge the mistake and my defeat. I have to thank those who understand me and those who tried to help. Also, I still appreciate those who told me that this is not me. Thank you for shaking my shoulders and waking me up from this nightmare.

I guess there are also those out there, with the same suffering as mine. Well, I actually do not ask for him back because right now, I am just waiting for him to come back. I was just kidding myself. Today and now is the perfect time to remake myself. I will play the game of life fair and square. I will not be defeated by this I will win.

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-i post . who reads. i do not know.-