THE SUNRISE

What happened to the idea of friendship? to the the thought of love? Where did they go?

I begun to wonder when people became too determined to tell their own definitions of these words and of sanity, morality and living life with it. They started losing who they are because they were so lost in the wonders of what committing sins could bring. The thrill of getting caught and the high of escaping punishment.  At the moment, they do not yet realize the consequences of their act, like wasting time and losing people and other things that really matter. I have been there. I see myself at these people, I know how it is to be lost in the midst of every single thing around me. Then I realized that I am the one complicating things because life is supposed to be simple and happy. We spend so much time thinking that we are bored so we try to do stupid things.

Yesterday, we were presented a series of video clips about accepting God. I loved the speaker because he did not tell us to repent our sins so that we will be saved. Instead, he told us his story that he was once lost and has searched for himself, in the end, he found God and submitted to his will.

We all need that shoulder to lean on. We all need that hand to pat our back. People can leave and never return and that feeling of being left alone bare and dry is so frustrating. Yes, we only have ourselves...

I think I have learned one of the lessons in life. I am so happy to have arrived at this point. I am satisfied. I hope that I can do this. And that I will have the will to with the help of God's grace.

*thank you friends

O THE STRESS!!!

On pain

On love

On studies

My actual problem is how I can relieve stress. How can I get out of this and love what I do. Give everything to it? I am actually doing them all now. See, I am trying to quit smoking and it is very difficult. I just try not to think about it whenever the thought comes. And there are these people that who are so shallow I do not know why I met them.

How do I relieve stress?
Eat
Watch Movies
Read books
Facebook
Eat a lot.

Sounds fun.

I also think that setting bigger goals might help. like buying a car maybe. Or a house or a gadget, because everyone seem to have one.

When did I realize this? Well, there was that time that I spent too much for coffee and smokes. Spent also a week's savings on beer. And I realized how it was all a waste of time and I also realized that it was not something to be proud of. It makes me feel so low and I feel more depressed. And that actually I hate being the weak one who gave up on her feelings. it just sucks as hell. So, I shall now try  to focus on what really matters, my studies. I love it so much- reading and writing. All the people I meet here who do not yet realize what they want while for some they already know and they are so focused! I love the energy. Indeed, we only live once so why not live it.

I am so happy. Happy at this realization but still struggling to make things work.