CHANGES

Changes are fearful. Yet, its effect is massive and permanent. Once you accept it, you are changed into a different person from that you knew before.

Why am I afraid of change? Why can't I accept the fact that people may change the roles they play in your life? Well, it struck me again. I am afraid of changes and I take so much time moving on from one phase to another. At first I thought that this is the way of living life, you should stop and smell the roses. But then, the more I do this, the farther becomes my distance from reality.

But then again, every person is distinct in their own ways. You can leave it just like that. What if this is just my way? Well, no one can object to that.

I am happier day after day because of this new found way of thinking about things. First, you know your fears and second, find your way around it.

Upon realizing that all the while I was scared and insecure of myself and my abilities, I started to stand up. Let loose and spread the wings to fly.

Life becomes a better picture when you start thinking positive. Even if the circumstances may deprive you of such way of thinking. Remember not to allow yourself to be defeated by negativity.

P.S

I must thank my dear friend who indirectly told me to think like a grown up. You always say the right words. And yes, it was wrong to be weaker than who I really am.

In the past months, I became that girl who was drunk everytime she felt bad or remembered something tragic. I would go home at the wee hours of the morning and spend the next day on my bed because I was hangover. I am never proud that I did those. Again, I asked myself why I was not proud. The answer is because it was not me.

After the indirect statement of my dear friend and the realization of my shame, I begun asking the question "is this me?", whenever I do something. It is so effective. Now I am back to blogging, reading and watching movies. Yes, this is so me.